Monday, 6 August 2018

Success

In the blogger world, success is often in reference to money or exposure. Often these two things go hand-in-hand, in that the more exposure you get the more you are in a position to ask to be paid for your work/ name/ face, etc. Blogging has become a business for many and an aspiration to even more, but are we being realistic?

Don't get me wrong, I think it's great to have ambition and to work and strive for a goal or goals, but I also think it's important to be realistic with those goals. There are so many factors that come into trying to make a blog a business. For example, bloggers whom have been able to make their blog their sole source of income are often white, slim/ slim passing, a small fat, able-bodied, cis gendered, and/ or with euro-centric beauty. There are of course other examples that correlate, but that's the starting point. Not every blogger is going to fall into that blueprint, nor should we, but unfortunately we have not yet reached a point where said factors do not matter. With every small achievement in the blogger world there is more to dismantle and more work to be done, and there are those whom spend a great deal of their time fighting the good fight, but we have to ask the question whether we will really ever achieve equality.

I think it's great that blogging has got to a point where a genuine career can be had. To have business relationships with brands and to work together to the benefit of both parties, and being self-employed certainly has its advantages. I read various blogs (yes, I still read blogs....more on that in another post) and there is a mixture of self-employed babes and blogging as a side-gig babes. There is room for us all; so with that, why do bloggers put so much pressure on themselves to be mini moguls, and why are bloggers whom do not wish to have their blog be a business made to feel guilty for not wanting to reap the benefits, through blogging?! I can sum it up in one quote....
Dress: Elvi^
Slip underneath: Marks and Spencer
Cardigan: H&M
Belt: Dorothy Perkins^
Sandals: Dorothy Perkins^
Clutch: Primark (gifted to me by the lovely Diana)^
Sunglasses: Sungalsses Hut^

"Comparison is the thief of joy."

That's it, right there. Theodore Roosevelt had it sussed. If we allow ourselves to get sucked into other people's worlds, we will always feel as though we're falling short. Achievements we might otherwise feel good about or even celebrate suddenly go by unacknowledged because we immediately look at what counterparts are doing, conclude that their lives and opportunities are better, and subsequently make ourselves feel lesser than. This mindset isn't sustainable for a healthy and happy mind and we have to unlearn lines of thinking that can be so damaging.

I've mentioned on my blog before how I have no desire to have this blog be a business. Yes I work with brands from time-to-time, and yes I do the odd interview and give the odd quote for an article, but I do those things out of pure enjoyment rather than with the hope of something major coming out of it. I don't want to be a famous blogger and I don't want to see my name in lights. Having said that, I'm not trying to shame anyone who does want that as I think we should all go for what we want if we truly; but I guess I'm just a grassroots blogger doing the work to ensure that self-worth, self-love and internal happiness is the message.
There is guilt that comes with this though. I'm a black blogger and oh how rare we are in terms of numbers, support and exposure, so, if anything, I should be kicking and screaming to be heard and to be at the forefront, but I'm not. It's just not my character. I'm shy and an introvert and those do not work well with being the centre of attention. Its never been my goal and part of me wishes it was, but I've chosen to stay true to myself and, most importantly, take care of my mental health which means I have to be in control of where my face and words are. I have turned down features, TV and radio interviews, and brand appearances because for varying reasons they just haven't sat right with me and I feel there are "better" (for want of a better word) black bloggers out there that are far more comfortable in the spotlight and who use their voice in ways I never could.
That's not a failing on my part because we're all different, but it goes back to what I deem as success. Success for me isn't about number of followers or how much money I can be paid, but about having just one person read my blog and feel good about themselves because they see someone like them on a platform (albeit a small one) trying their best to keep their head above water.

Because isn't that we're all trying to do? And in doing so, isn't that the greatest success?!


'til next time!


Love and hugs,
Isha xxx



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2 comments:

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